Testimony of Contentment despite Circumstances Renée Smith
Work in progress here is all I can really say about contentment. It is a daily and ongoing battle of the mind to, “Take our thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ.” 2 Cor. 10:5b. I am a weak vessel in need of a Savior; grateful for Jesus and eternal life- that’s my HOPE.
I need to remind myself constantly of that Bible truth as I battle horrible negative thoughts since my daughter Emily Renée Smith was run over by an 80 year old driving 60 mph and was sent to heaven at age18. She was a graduate of Hope International School in Asia and in her first year of Bible College with plans to come teach in Asia because she loved children. She came with me to New Hope for Orphans to volunteer while we lived there. We are missionaries and my husband Tiger, trains Nationals who are on our team (missionaries with WOM/WorldOutreachMinistries) and works with them to spread the gospel to those who have never heard the name of Yeasu/Jesus.
On the day Emily died, Tiger had just prayed, dedicating a rural village hut as a church to the Lord, when his phone rang. Our son Josh (also a Hope graduate) was calling from Moody Bible College in the USA telling Tiger that our daughter, his sister, Emily had just been run over by a car and was immediately sent to Heaven.
I believe it was a Spiritual Battle and have prayed unceasingly for protection from the enemy (Jn.17:15 with Jesus for all believers) even more since that day. At the time my body broke down in shock and I couldn’t even sleep till I tried everyone’s advice and found singing praises aloud was the only thing that helped to press through my family's tragedy and, like Job, praise the Lord. As Attalia, Emily’s best friend and younger sister says, “I will never not miss her and it hurts.”
I can NOT think of her every single day nor do I want to not think of her and keep her bright, funny memory alive. She brought so much joy and laughter to our family of seven (5 children, married right out of college in 1990). People who hear I am a breast cancer survivor (near death on chemo, baled) and then hear about Emily say, “Man a lot of bad things have happened to you. How do you keep a positive attitude” (my spiritual gift is encouragement as a teacher)?
I have to give all credit to the Lord God Almighty as I am not only a prayer answered to be alive, but my strength comes from the Lord. I turn to Him constantly, praying for help as I know I am a hurting pup. I thank my students, you all, friends, really anyone who gives me HOPE from God’s Holy Word. This gives me peace that transcends understanding. I have to battle thoughts (being real here) of Emily laying bloody on the ground after being run over, and push my thoughts to a Bible verse along with prayer in the battle of the mind where sin starts.
The Spiritual Realm is real and this should push me and us all to our knees to pray for one another for “protection from the enemy”-Jn.17:15. Thankfully, we’re on the winning side. Pressing on toward the “goal of Heavenward in Jesus Christ.”-Phil. 3:14.
Tiger, my husband is still so hurt he won’t even let me hang up pictures of Emily, yet. He says she’d want us to keep going with the gospel as his call is to,”Bring as many people to Heaven with us as we can.” He is currently in Asia spreading the gospel with our National staff and our son Josh. I live in the USA for the home base for our children to get through college. We appreciate prayers and know if our last day is tomorrow we get to reunite with Emily. I could go on and tell you of the Spiritual battle being real in Asia, opposed to more hidden in the USA. For example, we battled a ten foot King Cobra close to our front door when we got home after many rural villagers came to Christ, but you get the picture.
I’m ready, are you? Let’s pray for His strength to make it together.
SO much Love in Jesus-Renée Smith
P.S I was asked to write this and hope and pray it will encourage others to press on and remain in prayer for one another-John 17:15-22- praying for you all, believers!
